Janathon 2017, Day 25 – Pool night



I’ve completed my daily step goal and my Janathon exercise by walking to the pub and back. If it hadn’t have been for Janathon I wouldn’t have bothered as I’m bunged up with a cold. I also couldn’t drink because I’ve got a hospital appointment early tomorrow.

At the moment I hate Janathon. I just want it to be over.
At the same time I realise that I’ve got up and done more exercise because of it.

I think I just hate my life at the moment. There’s really no reason to bother doing anything. I wake up, I feel tired. I try to do something. I just feel exhausted all the time. I know it’s depression hitting me full force in the face. It’s so much worse at this time of year. But there really isn’t any reason for me to be here. (No, I’m not about to try to commit suicide. So don’t worry). I’m no use to anyone and I’m stuck inside this body, this house…  I’m so worthless. I want so much to have a life that means something. But I’m just stuck here alone.

Forgive me, I’m in a bit of a rut.
I’ll try to write something more upbeat tomorrow.

Oh, and I accidentally wore the wrong leggings to the pub. That didn’t help. They were a pair I made a while ago. Forthwith they shall be called “the-leggings-that-fall-down”. After walking roughly 50m I have to keep yanking the flipping things up. Why? Because I accidentally made them with too small a backside. And trust me, that shouldn’t have been an issue because there’s not that much junk in this here trunk. And I tried to fix it by adding extra material. That fabric somehow, inexplicably, got added to the front instead of the back. So, these leggings are a patchwork mess that still fall down.
And why did you need to know that?
1. You didn’t really.
2. I would have walked home the long way today had it not been for my misbehaving legwear.

Pool Night: Walk to pub and back
Steps Taken: 5,087
Difficulty level: medium

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3 thoughts on “Janathon 2017, Day 25 – Pool night

  1. the point is…you did it even when you didn’t feel like it!

    I am not going to try to talk you out of feeling the way you feel because they are your feelings, so I am in no position to tell you you are wrong!! Just know that there are people (well me…I can’t speak for others) who are genuinely interested in what you are up to… and not in a crazy stalker way…

    I am not going to say I know how you feel with the depression thing, because that is ridiculous…I only know how I feel when it happens to me…but I can relate, I am having trouble with anxiety and believing people care whether I am around or not at the moment… I have no idea if it helps me telling you that but I am leaving it in!

    In other news, I found my first geocache yesterday, it was one of the ones I went to look for on Tuesday, I looked harder yesterday and I found it 😀 I was so excited!! Thank you for getting me into this!! 😀

    Like

    1. Whoop! Well done 🙂
      Even if you never find another, you have now been indoctrinated into the wonderfully weird world of geocaching.

      As for depression: it is what it is 😦 I’ve lived with it for my entire adult life. I’m so lucky to have a loving and understanding family to keep me going. I know that life would be unbearable without them.
      And I for one, want to hear about your further adventures: van related, exercise related, dance related, anything related.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I have and I love it!!

        Having a family around really does help!

        I find that adventures keep depression at bay, it is one of those things that we have to find a way to live with!

        😀 I love that you are following the van blog 😀 I am hoping it will be exciting… it will almost certainly come to Wales at some point 😁

        Liked by 1 person

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