Juneathon 2017, Day 15 – A Crochet Day

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African Flower Hexagons

As it was a nice day today I went out in the garden and did a little crochet. The photo above shows the five hexagons that I completed. So far I’ve made 33 of them. I’m hoping to have enough patience to make 225 and to make a square blanket. I don’t really know what size it’ll be; it doesn’t matter.
I started crocheting in earnest about 3 years ago when my muscles started to deteriorate. It gave me something that I was able to accomplish without too much mental or physical effort. And today I grabbed my crochet and headed outside because mentally I was incapable of anything else. After making a fair few of these little flowers I know precisely what I’m doing and how many stitches to make. As the hook flows through the work my mind is able to relax and forget about all of the things that are niggling away at me. The dark thoughts are banished into the dark recesses of my brain as if by magic. It feels good to crochet. And on a sunny day like today, crocheting in my safe little back garden is one of the best remedies for my mental illness that I can think of.

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A wee fellow enjoying one of my poppies

Unfortunately, even after enjoying a very relaxing couple of hours in the garden, my schizophrenia was still having far too much fun inside my head.

Doing exercise for Juneathon is fine when I’m feeling well mentally, but it’s virtually impossible on days like these when my brain is trying to shut me down and the horrible thoughts are like a thick, dank fog hovering around my head:
“You’re useless! You’re fat! Nobody likes you! You’re dirty! You smell! Your family hates you! You don’t have any friends! What you wrote yesterday about shoes: that was stupid! You’re so stupid. You can’t even manage to put plates in the dishwasher! Other people don’t need a dishwasher. They wash things. They do things. They’re not lazy. You’re so lazy! You’re an embarrassment. No wonder no one ever wants to talk to you. Why would they ever want to talk to you? …”
On and on and on…

The last thing I wanted to do was to go out for a walk. But I couldn’t face anything else either. Walking will often drive the thoughts away, just as crocheting does. I suppose it’s the meditative, calm state that I get into when I’m doing either activity. Unfortunately dancing, yoga, lifting weight etc. just don’t have the same effect.

So, I compromised: today would have to just be a day when I reached my step goal and felt satisfied with it. But, I thought I’d try to do one better and go outside in order to reach my goal.
It took one walk up my street and then down a neighbouring street to reach 3,000 steps, whereupon I sighed with relief and scurried home.

A Crochet day: met daily step count
Steps Taken: 3,682
Difficulty Level: Intermediate

Janathon 2017, Day 14 – A lunch date

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As today’s exercise for Janathon I walked roughly 1.5 miles to and from my lunch date.

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Today I had the delightful company of my niece and my sister. So it was a girly outing. It was our normal place to lunch – a “greasy spoon” type of cafe that I plucked up the courage to go to a few years ago when I heard good reports about it. It’s great to take my niece and nephew into because I don’t feel worried that any accidentally spilled baked bean will send fearsome scowls our way.

As you might have noticed from the picture above, I took my crochet with me. It helps to while away the time whilst I’m waiting for the rest of the gang to arrive. Today they were late, so I was glad I’d taken it with me.

There’s nothing more to report about today’s exercising. Tomorrow may be difficult because my niece is staying over, and the little cheeky miss runs me ragged. Hopefully some exercise will get done tomorrow.

And here’s a photo of the little madam.
We totally did not go into the ice-cream parlour after her mum left. I am not a naughty aunty.

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A lunch date day: 1.5 miles
Steps Taken: 5,414
Difficulty Level: Medium

Janathon 2017, Day 13 – Happy crochet

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I’ve been trying all day to get some exercise done. To get anything done in fact. But my depression hit me hard today. It was with quite a bit of relief that I felt well enough at about 6pm to pick up my crochet.
After choosing my next colour I also decided upon a plan. An exercise plan: after every row, I’d walk up and down the living room 10 times. Short bursts to try to attain my minimum step goal for the day. And it worked!

(I was very good and removed my Vivofit2 whilst I was crocheting. It gets a tad confused when it’s on my wrist and I’m hooking away. I think it believes I’ve suddenly turned into a world class runner.)

Happy Crochet day: reached daily step goal
Steps Taken: 3,094
Difficulty Level: Hard